a wedding planning guide
adults-only wedding invitation wording: how to say it kindly
by sophia + colby, chasing robins media · provo, utah
- where to say it: your wedding website, the invitation details, and the rsvp. the more places, the fewer awkward texts.
- how to say it: warm and short. no long explanation needed.
- the quiet fix: address the envelope to only the invited names, not “and family.”
- the heads up: tell your parents and a couple of close friends so word spreads kindly.
an adults-only wedding is a completely normal choice, and it is one a lot of couples feel unsure how to word. the good news is you do not need a long explanation. a warm, short sentence in the right places is enough, and it keeps everyone on the same page without anyone feeling left out.
where to say it
say it in more than one place, so no one has to guess.
- your wedding website (right on the home page or the details page)
- the invitation or details card
- the rsvp card or rsvp page
- how you address the envelope
wording you can borrow
use these as they are, or make them sound like you.
- warm and simple: “we love your little ones, but we have chosen to make our celebration an adults-only event. we hope you can enjoy a night out!”
- short and sweet: “adult-only reception. we cannot wait to celebrate with you.”
- for the rsvp card: “we have reserved ___ seats in your honor.” this makes it clear exactly who is invited.
- for the website faq: “can we bring our kids? we love them, but our wedding is adults-only. we hope this gives you a night off!”
address the envelope to invited names
this is the quiet line that does most of the work. write only the names of the people who are invited, for example “sarah and james miller,” not “the miller family” or “and guests.” if kids are not invited, their names are simply not on it.
tell a few people first
give your parents and a couple of close friends a heads up before the invitations go out. they will answer questions kindly and the word spreads without you having to explain it over and over. pick one person who handles the “what about my kids” questions so it is not you.
what to say when someone asks
you do not owe anyone a long explanation. one warm sentence is enough:
- “thank you so much for asking! we love your kids, but we have decided to keep our celebration adults-only. we hope you can still join us and enjoy a night out. we would love to have you there.”
the free cheat sheet has all of this in one place, with a spot to write your own line and a checklist so nothing gets missed.
questions we get a lot
is it rude to have an adults-only wedding?
no. it is your day, and it is common. saying it kindly and early is what keeps it from feeling awkward.
what about my own family’s kids?
decide on one rule and stick to it, so nobody feels singled out. some couples make an exception for immediate family, such as nieces and nephews in the wedding party. whatever you pick, say it the same way to everyone.
what about a baby who is nursing?
many couples make a quiet exception for nursing babies. you can mention it in your faq, or just handle it kindly if it comes up.
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